I had a good talk with a friend yesterday. We just talked about what was going on in her life; it wasn't so much her story, but her insights related to the story that affected me. It lasted no more than 20 minutes, and I'm sure she doesn't know the impact she had on my day.

This is something I've been thinking on ever since.

There is only one source where all things negative originate: Satan. Any negative thought, negative judgement, negative action starts with Satan. He is manipulative, cunning, and he probably knows us better than we think we know ourselves. No good things come from him. If we give in to those negative thoughts, even momentarily, we give power to Satan. We let him win, even if it is for an instant, he has gained a victory.

A lot of my "negative" thinking is about myself... Now don't get me wrong, I am so happy about my life and the people in it. I LOVE MY LIFE. I know I am incredibly blessed. But I have weaknesses. And I know that my biggest one is to be overly critical about myself. (and i can be kind of a messy person) One thought can put a damper on my day, because I choose to dwell on it. And then of course I make it bigger than it is by analyzing other things that are "wrong" with me or I think about things I should be better at, or what I can do to make others happier. yadda yadda... vicious cycle. And I know I won't change over night. But I know that thinking about negative thinking in this way,
remembering that these thoughts are coming from satan, that he is winning when I give in to these thoughts, well it just makes me want to fight it all the more.

I'm starting my new years resolution early... What do you say friends? Can we choose to combat satan one ugly thought at a time?

tender mercy of the day: yesterday was just a good day for self-reflection... As I was driving out to one of our other offices, I switched the radio station and found a classic- "the middle" by one of the greats, Jimmy Eat World. It's been one of my faves for years, I've heard it a million and a half times, but I think yesterday is the first time I've really listened to it. If you have some time, I would grab your ipod and click on over to it... it really is good for the soul.


danielle stolworthy said...

thanks for the reminder :)
hope you're doing well!

nate and amy crandell said...

Love you Girl :)

The GREENE House said...

I don't know you, I just happen on your blog from time to time. This is the first post that moved me to comment though. I can tell from your other posts that you love life, there's no doubt about that. Your attitude about your church, your husband, it seems you have a passion for life that so many lack. Don't worry too much about being a Debbie Downie sometimes. Everyone has their vices and everyone is critical of themselves. The best thing to do is constantly remember your blessings. It seems like you already do that though! Keep it up!

Lauren and Brian Davis said...

Hello??? Are you writing a biography about ME?? But seriously ... I get into the SAME VICIOUS CYCLE! One thing that I am learning is that other people do it too .. case in point - YOU! It helps when you learn that you are not alone. I really thought I was crazy .. like way crazy. But then I finally started talking to people about it and realized others have negative thoughts, dwell on things FOR A LONG TIME (probably not as long as me though!), get made at their husband for dumb things, etc. etc. It's frustrating to make progress and then slip back into negativity ... but hey I guess that is what is going to happen. No perfection over night .. damn! Anyways - hang in there. Keep trying! I'll do the same!

Davis and Melanie Erickson said...

That is just what a needed today. Thanks Ang! Love you girl.